Posts Tagged ‘Online Dating sites’

Not a Fan

     I know, it is absolutely crazy to join an online dating site and expect to actually meet people.  Ludicrous, right?  It is no secret that this blog all started because of online dating and the men I met.  Meeting men online and finding dates is not a problem.  Finding ones I want to keep around…well, that’s a whole different issue.

      Since I have become well versed, so-to-speak, with dating websites, I feel it my duty to report when I find a lousy one.  Sadly, Dr. D steered me wrong on this one.  She gives a list of top recommended dating sites to use, and PerfectMatch.com shouldn’t make the list.  She may have recommended it for its “FREE Duet Compatibility Profile.”  I assure you nothing is free.  Once you fill out all the info to register you need to pay to actually see and do anything that might have been “free.”  There’s no free trail period and I can see why.  The whole sight is a catalogue of out-of-stock products.

     Seeing as I forked over the dough for this broken machine, it seemed right to complain and try to get my money back.  I mean, I’m paying for a service that’s not being provided right?  I emailed a complaint about how I have not had any responses to the ice breakers/emails I sent and that I’m looking for people in my area and have only been contacted by people from across or in another country.  Here’s a look into my relationship with Johnny 5: 

Johnny 5’s response email:  Members utilize their Perfectmatch accounts in a variety of ways – and
some may only ‘check in’ once a week. Others might be busy with work, on vacation, pursuing another relationship on Perfectmatch – or are taking a break. 
…When waiting for responses to your Icebreakers or email, generally, I recommend a 2-week period before moving on to another member, or not pursuing communication further with a non-responsive recipient.  We ask that members who are not going to be utilizing their Perfectmatch account for an extended period of time *hide their profiles* temporarily, …However, members can initiate MAIL and ICEBREAKERS with all other members they may find when using one of our various searches.  Thus it would be completely possible for you to receive matches from various locations.  Have you used our advanced member search capabilities yet?  …Please keep in mind that when utilizing the ‘CUSTOM SEARCH’ tool, you will be able to search for members by more specific factors, such as interests, education, background/values and lifestyle traits – at ranges as close as within 25 miles of your zip code. 

Zia’s thoughts:  Ah, duh, really?  And hell no there is no 25 miles range option – it’s 75!  You’re trying to tell me there is no one compatible in a 75 mile range?  Man, I’m in trouble. 

Zia’s response:  Hi Johnny 5,  Yes, I realize that people have different approaches to using online dating, but I have a hard time believing you guys have created a site where all members check in once in a blue moon, are on a break, or a permanent vacation.  I wouldn’t really recommend using that as a selling point, since I believe most people who try dating online expect at least 1 or 2 results. 

     I am not exaggerating when I say I initiated contact by sending out 40 icebreakers and have gotten NO responses from those.  Am I to believe that ALL of those people forgot to “hide” their profiles?  I have waited 3 weeks, per your 2 week recommendation and still nothing.  I’ve sent emails as well and the only response I received was from a man who didn’t even know he had an account and gave me some email address to contact him because he said he doesn’t use this site. 

Johnny 5’s response email:  Hello Zia, I do see that you have sent out quite a few IceBreakers and have just
received a few responses back. 
…you have had success with email replies. In fact I see several members who seem interested in you. You might try to see if they would like to meet for coffee somewhere so that you can get to know each other. It’s just a thought. 
     Also, our most successful members attribute their success to being very pro-active in reaching out to other members. Since you have had success with email I would suggest sending a quick email demonstrating your interest to any member you find interesting. I see you have not sent email recently, so you might give this a try. 
 
Zia’s thoughts: Oh dear God, this guy is a drone reading from a script. 

Zia’s response:  In regards to the email replies: one was from a man out of the country, one was from a man across the country, one was from a file you guys pulled for reasons I’m assuming relate to wack-a-doodle status (which I grasped right away from his 20-yr-old pic & 47-yr-old claim, along with creepy wording), another was from the man I said didn’t know he had an account and redirected me to another email, and one was from a man I responded to but never heard back from.  That only leaves mister “potential stalker” status who just keeps emailing me his phone number and “when can we go out” emails without asking anything about me or telling me much about himself.  None of those seem like very possible or safe “meets for coffee.” 

…I’ve used all the search options and changed it up, not being ubber picky, just trying to see if I get some response. I haven’t sent an email in a while because the same people who aren’t responding, are the ones who keep coming up.  …also have issues with your site sending me an email, telling me I have a new one from a member, only to go to my inbox and find nothing there but the old ones. 

     I have been on other dating sites before and have never had this issue.  I know I’m no supermodel, I’m aware of the merchandise I’m pushing.  Since your site wasn’t working for me, I recently tried another.  This week alone I have 3 dates.  No joke.  So can you see or at least understand my frustration with your company. …I feel like I am wasting money.
     Johnny 5, I know you’re just doing your job and giving the responses they are telling you to and I respect that.  I’m just saying I am a very dissatisfied customer and would like a refund.  …in all honesty, your site just really isn’t working for me.  If you need to forward me along to a supervisor or manager that’s fine.
 

Johnny 5’s response email: …However, members can initiate MAIL and ICEBREAKERS with all other members they may find when using one of our various searches.  Thus it would be completely possible for you to receive matches from various locations.  …Have you used our advanced member search capabilities yet?  …Please keep in mind that when utilizing the ‘CUSTOM SEARCH’ tool, you will be able to search for members by more specific factors, such as interests, education, background/values and lifestyle traits – at ranges as close as within 25 miles of your zip code. 

Zia’s thoughts: Deja vu.  Didn’t I already read all that?  Ugh. 

     I didn’t bother responding again.  Figured I’d take matters into my own hands.  I’ve already wasted my money and don’t want others doing the same.  I am sure you all know someone dating online or thinking about it.  Please urge them not to use PerfectMatch.com.  I realize by encouraging people not to join, I lessen my chances of meeting someone on there by no new members joining, but I like to think of it as “taking one for the team.” 

     If you or someone you know is looking for a dating site here are a few successes I know:  Cousin Jo-Jo, recently married, e-harmony.  Best friend from high school, engaged and baby on the way, plentyoffish.  And another friend’s current boyfriend and smooth sailing relationship, match.com.  

And just in case you’re not completely sold on my argument, have a look at the most recent “perfect match” for me.  This seem acurate to you?

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