Emailers

          The week started off with a bang.  By Sunday night I had about five to seven emails from all new guys.  The number, of course, quickly dwindles with the opening of meaningless moronic “How are you?” emails, and sadly for some of them, a glimpse at their picture does the trick. – Oh, don’t give me that, you know you do it too.

          One of the emails was from a guy that had emailed before.  He said, “When are we going to get that drink?”  Funny, I don’t recall responding to his first email, so what the hell makes him think I want to meet him for a drink this time?

          One of the new guys sent probably the best first email I have seen to date.  Hey guys, listen up, if you really want to show a woman that you read her profile and are interested, try this guy’s approach.  You know those junk emails you get from friends and family members, who have nothing else to do, where you have to fill in your answers and then send it to them and everyone you know?  Only for them to fill it out and then send it back to you and everyone they know?  He basically took that approach, but it worked.  He copied and pasted my About Me section into the email and then proceeded to respond to my information.

Note to morons: Rather than saying, “we have a lot in common” and then never clarifying; try this and you can avoid that phrase.  You might even get a laugh out of her.  You will definitely get her attention.

          By midweek I had narrowed it down to three.  Bachelor #1 is in the one-two line email phase.  Bachelor #2 is a slow roller and we’re working on our second emails.  And Bachelor #3 is at phone number stage.  The only reason Bachelor #3 is at the phone number stage is, as usual, for my own amusement.

          During the first couple emails we discovered we have the same “Golden Rule” philosophy of life, common interests, and both want to find someone that’s actually interested in getting to know them.  The latter is the part that amuses me.  In his profile he states how he doesn’t want someone who wants him for his looks.  Now, the man is not all that, so it made me smile and of course I had to ask.  -Come on, you knew I was going to.  So I replied to an email and put in a BTW your profile said…and asked if he met a lot of people on the website like that or just in general.  To which he replied that he has met a lot of people who have only wanted him for his “material possessions.”  Apparently he has a very nice car.  Guess, we’ll have to wait and see.

          Oh, and for those of you following, I did respond to the kid with the bad joke (Really, That’s the Impression You Want to Make).  Tried to explain why it wasn’t the best approach.  Foreseeing his response, he accused me of having no sense of humor.  No, not the case I replied. 
Then he decided he wanted to start over.  He reintroduced himself.  Then I got a joke about a monkey holding a…

Decided to hold off on the charity work for a more worthy recipient.

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3 Comments »

  1. erica Said:

    Oh your posts are great

  2. Jimmy Said:

    Great post, and great work for replying to joke boy. Looking forward to hearing how the three go. And I DO plan to steal that guy’s copy and paste technique.
    plentymorefishoutofwater.blogspot.com/

  3. LMAO!!!! this is soooo true, signed on last night, after saying it on twitter, and u get like 8 mails, open it, (sigh) then delete


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